I am not your captain
by Anonarra
Summary: The air was heavy with Luffy's overbearing Haki, and his swordsman strained to stay standing strong. "Sorry, Zoro." Luffy said as he increased the pressure. / "You can't give up like this!" Zoro choked out. "You…you can't possibly expect me t-to…" *thud* Oneshot
1. You can't do this to me, Captain

**I am not your captain.**

 **Hello People! I was watching No Game No Life and thought the concept of erasing your very existence sounded cool and angsty, so have this while I procastinate everything else. My phone is currently unavailable, so if any of you are from Wattpad as well as this site, I apologize. I dont like using my computer to type my fanfics much, but here you go. One-Shot. Angst. Hurt/no Comfort. I apaologize for any errors, this is all straight from my noggin' so criticize to your heart's content.**

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"Sorry, Zoro." His clear voice pierced the eerie silence of the dead island. The resigned tone only spurred on the swordsman's rage.

"Luffy, enough! What are you _doing_ , you damn idiot? Hell, what are you _thinking?!_ " The swordsman, squinting to focus, faintly feels Sanji's aura dim into unconsciousness. Still, he does not back down. "I'm not about to roll over and have my captain just up and leave after everything! Bullshit!"

Luffy stares neutrally at Zoro, who is leaning slightly on one of his katana for support, yet still stood tall. Lips curling downwards, he wills his swordsman to fall.

 _'Fall, damn it._ ' the Strawhat Captain thinks, and sees his strong nakama stagger slightly as he imposes even more of his Haki on the swordsman. _'Please._ '

 _'No, Captain.'_ Zoro growls mentally. _'You won't leave us. Luffy. I'll never let you!'_

"Zoro." Luffy's voice is even, and his gaze hardens further. "Stop, Zoro." He murmurs, and releases another powerful burst, stronger than the last. The former bounty hunter fell to his knees, gripping his katana like a lifeline as he tried to breathe even breaths. The air was heavy with Luffy's Conqueror's Haki, all of it focused on the only other one conscious…barely conscious.

 **"** You can't give up like this!" Zoro choked out. "You…you can't possibly expect me t-to…"

 _thud_

Monkey D. Luffy walked over to his first crewmate, and looked around at everyone else. They didn't know what was actually going on, only that he was going to leave. Only Zoro knew the truth, but he won't for long if all goes right. Smiling somberly, he leaned over and…

* * *

Roronoa Zoro wakes up on the Thousand Sunny to the faces of his nakama staring down worriedly at him. **_Someone was missing_**. He arched a brow and sat up, noticing the familiar worn wood of the deck. **_Where is he, where is my Captain?_**

"Wh-where's Luffy?" he asked immediately, looking around hoping, _hoping_ to see the rubber bastard so he could kill him and throw his ass overboard for even _thinking_ about—

"Luffy who?" Usopp asked, baffled. Zoro's brows furrowed worriedly. He was about to explain when someone placed something light on his head. Turning around, Zoro saw Nami smiling at him exasperatedly. She had given him the **straw hat**.

"Why did you give me this?"

"…Because it's yours?" She replied uncertainly. "You've never let it out of your sight, no matter how many times I tell you it clashes horribly with your outfit." She sighs. "Honestly, Zoro, stop acting weird. As Captain, you should be more responsible."

"Shitty Mosshead, you should listen to what Nami-swan says. You're no Captain if you snooze off all day." Sanji added, off to the side, and realization dawns on Zoro.

 _'It worked.'_ He thought to himself in horror. _'He really fucking did it.'_

"Oi…Sanji…" He said quietly, ignoring the surprised look of his crewmates for using the blond's name. "Who convinced you to leave the Baratie?"

"Has that weird storm messed up your—"

"Just answer the damn question, Sanji!" Zoro growled, further stunning the other three. Sanji's expression grew concerned as he stepped forward.

"… _You_ did, Zoro. What's going on?"

"Usopp," Zoro continued, ignoring the chef's inquiry. "Who helped you defeat the Black Cat Pirates and Kuro on your home island?"

"You and Nami did." The sniper replied hesitantly.

"Nami." The swordsman called, and the navigator jumped a little. "Who defeated Arlong for you and claimed you as nakama? Who beat Buggy in Orange Town?"

"You did those things, Zoro…why are you asking these things?"

"Me…not…not Luffy?"

"That's the second time you've mentioned that name." Sanji observed. "Someone important to you? Who is Luffy?"

"Luffy is…Luffy is our Captain, I can't be captain—"

* * *

 _"You…you can't possibly expect me t-to…" '…take your place, take your dream, and push away mine, though I would never refuse.…'_

 _Footsteps walked closer as his consciousness faded, and something light was placed on his head. "Become Pirate King for me, won't you, Zoro?"_

* * *

"That…that _selfish bastard!"_ Zoro suddenly screamed, curling forwards and punching the wood of the deck in **_TERROR ANGER DESPAIR HOPELESSNESS GREIF_** so suddenly that Nami, Usopp and Sanji flinched. "Telling me to steal his dream, fuck, why? _Why_?!" The other three looked on worriedly and tried to obliviously console their Captain in vain as he screamed in rage at whoever this "Luffy" was.

"I have my _own dream_ , damn it. What kind of captain are you, you selfish…" he ranted halfheartedly. "I can't believe you, Luffy."

 _'I don't want to forget you!'_ he thought. ' _You're already fading from my memories, and I'm the only one. You'll really die…! Stop these false memories, I don't want them. Luffy, come back damn it.'_

 _'To choose between your existence or that of your nakama. I'd rather you lived, even if you were alone, because then you'd make more friends. You always could.'_

"Captain, are you okay?"

Zoro flinched at the title and looked up, tear streaked face revealed to all.

"I'm _not_ your captain."

* * *

 _"Become Pirate King for me, won't you, Zoro?"_

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 _'Damn it, Luffy.'_


	2. NOT A NEW CHAPTER--YET

NOT A CHAPTER—YET. HEAR ME OUT

Gah! Fine! I admit it! I HAVE wanted to give you guys as well as myself a conclusion to this. (;-;). But FIRST: A reviewer with a point as well as an explanation…

skipsi

 _It's good but it doesn't make sense. Conquerer Haki doesn't make people forget stuff, it knocks them out for a while and can be infused with armorment haki. Plus, luffy's bounty wouldn't have disappeared along with him. And also, why are they all on the merry instead of the sunny?_

Well, as I said, this is all off the top of my head. All on a whim, and I've explained what had happened in the beginning. Now on the Merry part:...oops?

The concept originated from No Game No Life, An anime I can never really imitate, but I loved a concept they introduced: Erasing one's existence.

I don't know how, but at some point post timeskip, Luffy, alone, encounters an enemy with the power to fulfill any bets. This...is the one time Luffy's luck fails him. He loses the bet, but somehow takes the other guy with him, and before he completely vanishes, he uses Conqueror's Haki to knock out his nakama to bring them back to the ship.

They all are aware that Luffy lost something, and is now leaving them because of it. He knew they would fight back, and it would hurt them both if they stay conscious as he slowly leaves them. So he knocks them out, to make his vanishing as painless to them as possible.

Zoro and Sanji lasted the longest, but in the end, it's left to the first mate to try and get their captain back.

...he doesn't.

Despite all this praise, I don't want to make this story a long-term thing. I will be taking ideas from YOU, reviewers, so give me some good ideas. Louve Garoue has already offered some:

 _Damn, This is SO good. It Clearly deserves a sequel !_ _  
_ _You can make Zoro lose his memory and make the entire crew feel something is missing ( in fact, you can do that even if Zoro keeps his memory ). Or you can make Zoro remember and try to bring Luffy back. Or you can make whatever you want but seriously there's so many possibilities. That would be a waste to do nothing with it. Please do a sequel! That was too awesome to not._

 **So, Vote!** What do you want in the next chapter(s)

1- _Zoro loses his memory as well, and the entire crew feels something off_

2- _Zoro keeps his memory, his nakama label him crazy, but they, deep inside, feel something important is missing._

3- _Zoro remembers and stays determined to find Luffy and bring him back_.

4-Zoro actually tries to carry on, but he struggles to find the will he used to. The other strawhats try to "fix" him, but feel something…something is terribly wrong.

Also… geissel2002rivas

 _This is good ... damn ... bone level of imagination I would never have thought of something like that ... by God I hope you continue it is a great fic ... I love it .. I hope you do not delay in update ... thanks for taking the time to write_ _  
_ _ATT: a faithful reader_

Gah! Your pretty complements won't make me happy…idiot! (/)

Apologies if this is late, but my browser had refused to update and IDK how to publish through the iPhone app. I don't know how to use fanfiction . net with the app at all, actually.

- **Anonarra Rorokitake**


	3. Burden of Revelation

**Chapter Two: Burden of the Revelation**

Author's Note: Okay, this chapter took hella long to produce, but heck, here it is! I sorta winged it, and I didn't thoroughly re-read for any errors. Post Timeskip, I've decided. Please don't send me anything about plot, I really don't have one outside of a vague idea of what I want.

I hope you all enjoy this new installment!

Disclaimer: I don't own One Piece

 **Burden of the Revelation**

Robin was the one to knock him out. Gently, and swift, a quick strike to the back of his neck. Sanji would have, only it might lead to a head injury making everything worse. Perhaps it was caused by a head injury, leading to some sort of amnesia? But when, and how? They were all together. **_Were they?_** How would Zoro get a head injury, anyway? He was made of— ** _No… he's not._**

They couldn't rid themselves of the utter _wrongness_ they had all shared since they woke up from unconsciousness on the deck of the Sunny. Then Zoro woke up. He was supposed to laugh brightly, say something stupid and funny and then the feeling would go away, but…

That…wasn't what _Zoro_ would do, was it…? **_No, it wasn't._**

Zoro, _Zoro_ had a panic attack. A breakdown. Zoro doesn't _do_ that. He was their captain, he was supposed to laugh it off and ask for some meat—no, _sake_!

 ** _It was wrong, it was_** **all** ** _wrong._**

The crew all gathered in the galley, some glancing worriedly at the infirmary door. When Chopper walked out, all glanced up hopefully, expecting Zoro to walk out grumbling about whatever it was, and _then_ they would talk, and everything would be sorted out. **_Of course, it isn't_** **that** ** _easy._**

"Chopper?" Usopp straightened out of worry, seeing the confused and concerned undertone in the doctor's round eyes. "Anything?"

The doctor shook his head. "There was nothing I could find." Chopper said. "No head injury, no pricks of a needle, and there's nothing unusual in his blood." After Chopper said this, Sanji lit another cigarette, taking in a breath of the fumes, deep in thought.

"So he wasn't hit in the head, or drugged—through consumption _or_ injection." He voiced, partly relieved that whatever the reason was, it wasn't from his cooking. The rest of him only grew heavy under the weight of his concern. The man was an idiot, a walking marimo, but he was still his captain. Zoro, who fought against Mihawk in the Baratie, against Kreig, and then stalked off to beat up Arlong and one of his henchmen right after that and live.

Nothing was wrong. **_No… it was._** **All of it** ** _. It's all wrong-_**

"It's all _wrong_!" A voice suddenly cried. "Why does it make _sense_? It shouldn't?! What's wrong?!" A soft scraping of wood against wood as her chair slides back as she stands, pulling on the roots of her vibrant red hair, dulled somewhat in the artificial light of the galley. "Zoro is our captain." Nami says, but then she shakes her head, mumbling to herself. "No, no…"

Nami was the first of the crew to have met him. The crew didn't know how, or what had happened, but the navigator had always been Zoro's unofficial right hand. After knocking Zoro out, she was the one who ordered that they bring him to the infirmary. She was the one who silently told them to stay and wait afterwards. They were docked at an uninhabited island, they had time to wait.

"Nami-san…?" Brook, the one closest to her, reached forward to rest his hand on her shoulder, curling his fingers down to gently grasp it. "What's wrong—"

It was not the right thing to say.

 _"I don't know, but it's wrong!"_ She suddenly snapped at him, and those around her jumped at her sudden exclamation. Seeing where this was going, Robin crossed her arms to knock her out as well, but Nami raised a hand in her direction. "No…" She says quietly. "I'm calm…" Several, shaky, deep breaths followed this.

"Nami…?" Chopper asked this time. "Can you explain?" As the navigator nodded, Sanji pulled up her seat, having noticed her weakened legs. Gently easing her down into it, he pulled up another chair and sat down on it backwards, leaning on the backrest patiently.

Franky detached the table from the floor and folded it up, setting it to the side, leaving space for the other strawhats to gather around, either on the floor or their own chairs. Once they were all settled, Nami didn't wait to begin.

"I met Zoro in Orange Town, in the East Blue." She says firmly, looking down at her hands. "I had stolen a map from Buggy the Clown, who, at the time, scared the villagers away, and claimed the town for himself." A deep breath. "Buggy's henchmen were chasing after me… and that's when… that's when Zoro stepped in all of a sudden, using his swords which were still in their scabbards to shove the other men back…"

That's what she remembered.

 _-Flashback-_

 _"All of you guys are ganging up on just one girl?"_ The swordsman had mocked _. "Man, you guys must be weak!"_ Then he laughed, amused at the thought. Seizing her opportunity, Nami waved to him, smiling falsely.

 _"Wow, boss! You're here! Take care of these guys for me, will ya? Thanks!"_ And she had sped off. A minute or so after that, as she jumped to the balcony of a nearby house from its roof, she was prepared to watch and call the men away just in case the poor sap might die from her trickery, only to find the fight had ended one-sidedly, with the green-haired teen picking up his straw hat from the ground.

 _"Woah, you're strong!"_ She said in surprise, leaning forward to get a look at the guy she had duped. _"Say, do you want to team up with me?"_ she asked, leaping off her perch to land on the ground. She walked up to him, eyeing his katana for a second before meeting his narrowed gaze.

" _No_." He'd said after assessing Nami in return, walking off in a random direction.

 _"Hey! Wait!"_ Hoping for some extra muscle in her thieving endeavors, the thief quickly caught up to him.

 _"What is it? I'm not teaming up with you."_ He replied, continuing to take long strides forward.

 _"I owe it to you for helping me get rid of those guys."_ Nami said quickly. _"How about a meal? Are you hungry?"_ It would be a shame to not take advantage of her new acquaintance's strength. Those brutes were by no means weak, and he'd dealt with all of them in under a minute. As she mentioned food, his stomach growled, and his perpetual scowl deepened.

 _"Fine then."_ He relented as another rumble escaped his stomach. _"Lead the way."_

Nami did, walking to the nearest house on their left, the same one she had scaled earlier. Fiddling with the lock with a hairpin, she walked in.

 _"I'm Nami, by the way. I'm a thief who only steals from pirates."_ She introduces herself as she find the kitchen.

 _"Zoro."_ The man said simply, popping open a bottle of beer and drinking straight from the bottle. Nami froze, recognizing the name.

 _"Zoro?"_ she repeated, paling somewhat as she recognized the name. Glancing at the man's katana, the sight of three swords confirmed it. How had she not put two and two together?! _"As in, Roronoa Zoro, the Pirate Hunter?!"_

A flash of irritation washed over his face at her exclamation. This was it, she was going to die. She just tried to con _Roronoa Zoro_ into working for her. The demon of the East Blue! But the irritation melted into his neutral scowl as he glanced out the window. _"I never called myself a pirate hunter."_ Zoro grumbled, whether to her or himself. _"I hunt bounties so I can pay for a night at an inn and food."_

That threw Nami in for a loop, and cast a completely different light upon the swordsman before her. But despite the nicer and less ruthless impression she now has of him, the rumors still existed. Using this new information, she smirked, a plan forming in her head.

 _"Alright. There's a Pirate named Buggy in this town. He's worth 15 million, and has a bunch of loot to boot."_ She gestured to the map rolled up in her hands. _"I've already robbed him once, but if you help me, we can steal all his loot, and I'd get my money, and you'll get a cut of it for your own expenses. How about it? Deal?"_

The swordsman took a while to consider her offer, staring at her offered hand like it would bite him. To Nami's relief and satisfaction, his hand met hers in a firm shake.

 _"Fine. Then we'll part ways after this."_

 _-Flashback end-_

"My memory is mixed up after that, but we _did_ beat Buggy up, though Zoro got stabbed. He slept it off, and when he helped me carry the treasure we got to our little boats. For some reason, we decided to stick together, and then we met Usopp."

The sniper nodded, remembering the arrival of the two small dinghies.

"It sounds about right so far." Franky asked, confused. "Nothing sounds out of place." It was more of a question than a statement, and he let it hang in the air for Nami to elaborate.

"Buggy ate a Devil Fruit—the _Bara Bara no mi;_ the Chop-Chop Fruit. He could not be hurt by any kind of cutting attack." She recalled.

"And Zoro's attacks are all blade-based." Robin said, coming to realization. "He's a swordsman."

"So how did Zoro, _a swordsman_ , manage to beat him? I remember tying up various detached limbs so Zoro could deal the final blow, but I don't remember him ever using blunt attacks like a punch or a kick at all. He beat Buggy _and_ Buggy's first mate, but I can only clearly remember his fight with the first mate."

"He beat the Nyaban Brothers _and_ Kuro himself on my home island." Usopp suddenly said, suspicion in his voice. "And then he somehow fought Kreig _after_ his encounter with Mihawk!"

"Do any of you even remember Zoro fighting Krieg?" Sanji suddenly asked, a frustrated frown on his face. "I remember him leaping forwards to fight, but not anything about his injury from fighting Mihawk. He shouldn't have been able to, even as inhuman his vitality is." The chef, despite fighting with Zoro over every little thing, respected his crewmate when it came down to it.

"He fought both Hatchi and Arlong… it was just one fight after another for him all East Blue." Nami said, urging the conversation on. Something _was_ wrong, and it seems that it wasn't just her who felt it. There was something about all their adventures up until this point that just didn't add up. Things that must have been impossible.

"How did he fight Crocodile?" Robin suddenly muttered, but those who joined before her all stiffened, trying to remember. "How, when he was stopping the bomb with you all?"

"Wasn't it Pell who helped us?" Chopper asked. Usopp thought, trying to recall.

"Bird guy?"

"Yeah,"

"I'm... not sure..."

"What about Enel!" Nami suddenly pointed out. "Enel was a lightning logia, and Zoro's weapons of choice are metal?" She looked around at those who were there, Franky and Brook out of the loop. The cyborg barely spared a thought to his words before replying.

"Well obviously, he's made of rubb—" and he cut himself off, frozen.

 ** _Rubber_**. But it was wrong, wasn't it?

"Rubber." Robin stated. "But Zoro hadn't eaten any Devil Fruit." She reminded. There was an uncomfortable silence as they recall each of their adventures, and there was something about each of them that point at something very wrong. Especially…

"Ace…" Nami muttered, "…is not his brother." she whispered. A tiny part of her insisted that _Yes he was. They were!_

 ** _But that was wrong_**.

"Zoro's been fighting the battles of _two_ people our entire journey." Robin said suddenly, and the galley became deathly silent. That one sentence resonated something deep inside them. _All of them_. As the final blow, the infirmary door opened with a click, and there Zoro stood, a weary tenseness encompassing his entire presence.

"Monkey D. Luffy is the man who will become the Pirate King." His voice rumbled with powerful reverence, despite his shaken composure. His lone, unscarred eye glared with ferocity at an image unseen by any of his other nakama. His statement confirmed the implication of Robin's earlier statement. A burning determination settled in his gaze as he assessed each of the crew before nodding stiffly.

"We're going to find him." Zoro assures before he picks up his three katana right beside the infirmary door, and walked past his precious crew to go vent some frustration. The door to the galley clicks shut behind him. Before his feet even touch the grainy sands of the island's beach, the stone cliffs a few miles away collapse into the sea, leaving a smooth blade-like cut in its wake.

 _'I'll make this right.'_ The oath echoes in his head like the boom of the hundreds of trees toppling to the forest floor. _'The burden falls to me.'_


End file.
